Carolyn's Corner
LIFE COACHING
A couple of weeks ago I bought a new iPhone. You would not believe the phone I was presently using. It had been chewed by my puppy, been dropped so many times that the back plate that held the battery in place no longer existed and the battery was now being held in by a toothpick.
When my phone finally died, I had no choice but to buy a new one. I labored over the decision. I did research, I did comparison shopping, and I weighed the pros and cons. I wanted the iPhone, but I wasn’t sure if it wanted me. The truth is that I didn’t so much want the phone as much as I felt I needed the phone. It was time for me to grow up, accept that new technology really exists and bite the bullet and learn a new thing. The phone really would help me with my coaching business on lots of levels.
Reluctantly, I walked into the Apple store and I told the guy (who was so nice to help me) that what I really wanted was one of those cute pink princess phones; you know the kind with the rotary dial and the pretty coiled chord, that you could wrap your finger around when you talked to your boyfriend. He kind of just smiled, and I realized I had just shown my age Big Time.
The purchase was made and for the first week I ranted and I raved; I hated my new iPhone, absolutely hated it. Mine of course was defective, and thus it took several trips to the store to fix it. I hated my phone; I think I already said that, didn’t I? By now my 23-year-old son is continually saying to me, “Mom get rid of it, it’s not worth this much hassle and grief.” I would answer back, “I can’t, I feel like I’ve invested a week’s worth of pay, I’m in too far, I can’t go back.” And I knew in my heart that if I could just get past this hurdle it ultimately would make my business/life much better. But first I had to do the hard work of learning the phone; I had to accept that it was too late for turning back now and that in a matter of time, surely I would be texting, receiving emails, downloading Itunes, organizing my calendar and watching movies.
Have you ever said these words: “I can’t go back; I’m in too far,” “I wish I could go back; then my life would be better,” “I don’t have what it takes to make my life better; I’m just stuck,” “I loved the old, and I don’t want to move forward.”
Life is not much different than my iPhone story. At times we desperately cling to the old. It might be an old boyfriend, an old behavior, an old pattern, an old sense that times used to be better; a feeling of nostalgia that causes you to just stay stuck. Or maybe you don’t want to go back but the idea of moving forward is just too hard. The energy and strength sometimes it takes to move forward feels too overwhelming. You scream and you shout and you can’t go backwards and you can’t move forward. It’s called being stuck.
Stuck is a horrible feeling. It’s the feeling I felt when I couldn’t go back to the old phone, and yet this new iPhone felt completely foreign and uncomfortable. All my old tapes kept flooding in. I was not very smart, I’m scatter-brained, I’m really not able to stick with something long enough to learn it. All the self-sabotaging thoughts came flooding in. Of course, these thoughts did nothing to help me.
When I realized that I had the power to change all this, it was the most liberating experience. I had choice, I had freedom, I had power, and I had everything I needed to make this thing work. I could learn this, I could do this and I WILL do this. And I WILL feel EMPOWERED after I do it.
Do you stay in a job you hate for fear of change? Do you fear breaking up with an abusive relationship because maybe you don’t deserve better? Do you want to go back to school but you feel you just aren’t smart enough? Do you think if you could just go back and turn the clock, then life would be different?
What in your life could you change? What is preventing you from crossing that threshold of being stuck to walking in freedom? What do you want to go back to and WHY? What is pulling you forward but out of fear you don’t proceed?
In the end, ultimately I knew there were hundreds, I’m sure thousands, who had walked this learning curve before me. They were probably just as clumsy as I was at first, or at least some were I’m sure and they “got” it. They were enjoying life with a new IPHONE. It was there that I gave my hope and trust. They held the candle of hope for me.
Who do you know that you can turn to for answers? You need someone whom has gone before you and may be able to guide you into the future so it’s not so overwhelming. Begin today by claiming what you fear, resolve to move forward and think about the possibilities that life can bring you if you walk through life with empowerment and not with defeat. Claim today that you have a choice to make your life better. Claim the verse that says “I can do all things through Christ whom strengthens me” - Phillippians 4:l3. As we allow Christ to walk alongside us and allow him to gently move forward with us, we begin to have a powerful current that is moving in FORWARD, and NOT backward. Because moving forward is far more fulfilling and satisfying than staying STUCK.
My work as a Life Coach is to help you get unstuck and walk in freedom. My job is to help you take all your thoughts, your fears, your excitements, your questions, your procrastinations and help you turn them into FORWARD MOVEMENT. It’s a journey that will move you closer to living a more fulfilling and purposeful life.
If you are interested in coaching one on one, view my website at www.carolyngillcoaching.com. I will be glad to answer any questions you may have about coaching and what it can bring to you.
Blessings,
Carolyn